SAN ANGELO, TX – A metallic bright royal blue Chrysler 300 – the unofficial chariot of hood rats everywhere – decided to play chicken with a shiny, new Ford Expedition just after 6 p.m. on Saturday. Spoiler: The Chrysler lost its smile.
According to San Angelo police, the driver of the Chrysler 300 was cruising eastbound on San Antonio St. like he owned the block. But oopsie-daisy – he blew right through a stop sign while crossing N. Garfield, because why follow rules when you're living that hood rat life?
Meanwhile, the righteous Ford Expedition was innocently northbound, minding its own business in the intersection, when BAM! Collision ensued.
The grille of the Chrysler 300 – that flashy front bling that screams "I'm compensating for something" – was dramatically yanked off the car like a bad toupee in a windstorm when it T-boned the Expedition. The Ford, bless its burly heart, took the hit like a champ but ended up with some serious driver's side door dents and rear bumper damage, probably requiring very expensive therapy after the ordeal.
Police, ever the party poopers, slapped the Chrysler driver with a ticket for ignoring the stop sign – because apparently, "I didn't see it, officer" doesn't fly in Texas.
Miraculously, all the occupants at the crash scene were spotted chilling like nothing happened, in tip-top health. No word on whether the Chrysler will affix a new grille or just rock the toothless look from now on. Stay ratchet, San Angelo!

Hood Rat's Ratchet Ride Loses Its Grill in Epic SUV Smackdown

Hood Rat's Ratchet Ride Loses Its Grill in Epic SUV Smackdown

Hood Rat's Ratchet Ride Loses Its Grill in Epic SUV Smackdown

Hood Rat's Ratchet Ride Loses Its Grill in Epic SUV Smackdown

Hood Rat's Ratchet Ride Loses Its Grill in Epic SUV Smackdown
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Listed By: Rita Repulsa
Whaddya mean, "stay ratchet, San Angelo"? San Angelo's the whole dadgum toolbox, bromigo!
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